Thursday Thoughts

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jazz lilts out the window every day around this time.

as the notes make their escape out of the mystery saxophone player’s apartment into my ears

i can’t help but applaud their diligence and ponder about their age

a college student perfecting his homework? a seasoned professional going through the set list they’ll be playing at a smoky nightclub or bar in the Village?

Practice is something we are all taught at one point or another

but it is only truly harnessed by the impassioned and dedicated individuals who understand its power

Individuality is something we are all born with, something we all run away from eventually discover is the most vital attribute we have.

how hard it is to sometimes grasp that some carry that dedication for status, or things; items that are fleeting and, in the end, inconsequential

for these accolades and things can’t hold you when you cry

dance with you in your joy

or look you in the eye and utter “i’m proud of you”

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Vacancy

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I live here...

there is a place for you here

inside, you’ll find a hook for your coat

a spot for your shoes

and a chair to ease your weary feet.


there is a space for you here

inside of my heart

where the caverns and vessels have been cleared for your presence

to pump in and out of me

becoming a part of me


you are welcome here

you are wanted here

you are already here


will you find your place, your space, your nook in the crannies left waiting for you?

better yet, is there a space inside of you as cozy, as warm, as welcoming for me?

or is your door rusted shut, with the curtains drawn and the lights sitting dormant waiting for the true resident to fill this vacancy of yours?

Thursday Thoughts: Charleston

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Tears of heat stream down my face, as I once again watch my President, an African-American father of two, speak on the grave indecencies that have, once again, befallen members of his race.

The news of the Charleston travesty is still fresh. The rage, hurt, and confusion doing back flips in my heart and mind are intensified the more after watching President Barack Obama recount the events which occurred at a prayer meeting last evening in Charleston, South Carolina. There is a slight stoop in his posture, his eyes are downcast, a small feeling of defeat radiates from his being as he tells us about the need for gun control, about the inequalities so apparent in our country today, about the lives still being lost due to ignorance, privilege, vigilantes and bigots.

What can we do? What can be done? In a world, where a white woman believes she can carry the title of African-American woman for ten years and believe she is “trans-racial,” where do we stand? Is “The Dream” only a dream and nothing more? Have we, the nation, moved forward, or were just enough bread crumbs and rights afforded to a minority of people to keep us quiet and content. Was there an expiration on our rights and privileges? Did the powers at be proclaim, “When a black man holds the seat of power, as the leader of the free world, time will be up. If they didn’t ‘get’ everything they wanted, tough luck?”

Being cynical and suspicious are not words I use to describe myself. But this doubt cannot be suppressed. These questions are yearning for answers. I have no idea how to go about finding them, but I’ll start on this little old blog, and hopefully we can find the answers together.

M.