Wordy Wednesday

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Seasonal Questions

To be “In Like” or

“In Lust?”

To dream?

Or bask in the moment which just was “is?”

How do you keep the doors open

yet keep that small wall of protection around you?

Build the wall?

OR

Ban the doubt?

Leaves pop through frozen snow

Proclaiming the arrival of birth and new beginnings

Do I wish to be left behind in the polar vortex of my past?

OR

break free with effervescence and joy to the coming spring?

Friday Thoughts

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Kisses on noses

The spark that awakens hope

A quick glimmer of what was and what still could be

It happens in an instant

But the ripples in the pools of my mind continue to expand

Searching for the concrete resolution

That never did and never may exist

#AboutLastNight

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What a refreshing and lovely weekend! It was jam packed fun in Connecticut celebrating the marriage between my friends Lauren and Brooke. The ceremony was beautiful with Lauren’s father officiating the momentous occasion, quoting scripture and Ghostface Killah. The love was palpable, the food delicious, the tunes fantastic, and new friends were made over the course of the weekend.

A low key rehearsal dinner under the stars and twinkle lights Friday night, allowed us to see the gals one last time before tying the knot. I got to meet the brides’ families and college/childhood friends and trade stories about how we all ended up at the event together.

Apple picking, petting zoo, corn maze and a hayride were the pre-wedding activities I did with Ash Lee and Julia at March Farm. (A check off my bucket list. Woohoo!)

Since I still have limited storage over in my WordPress media, (grumble grumble) you should peep my Instagram feed on the left side of the screen for pics from the weekend!


Ciao

Vacancy

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I live here...

there is a place for you here

inside, you’ll find a hook for your coat

a spot for your shoes

and a chair to ease your weary feet.


there is a space for you here

inside of my heart

where the caverns and vessels have been cleared for your presence

to pump in and out of me

becoming a part of me


you are welcome here

you are wanted here

you are already here


will you find your place, your space, your nook in the crannies left waiting for you?

better yet, is there a space inside of you as cozy, as warm, as welcoming for me?

or is your door rusted shut, with the curtains drawn and the lights sitting dormant waiting for the true resident to fill this vacancy of yours?

Tuesday Thoughts

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Yesterday, my dad asked me a question:

“What’s your testimony today?”

I rolled my eyes (he couldn’t see this) and said “Dad, that’s not why I called you this morning.”

“I know, but you know the last time I was asked that was…”

And my father went back to a moment, when he himself had to answer the unexpected question. Hearing him open up about the changes that were occurring in his life, and how it all worked out in the end personally, financially and professionally, I was moved to speak.

“Actually, Daddy, I do have something to say”

You see, yesterday was my niece, Ava’s, 6th birthday. My brother’s first child, and my parents’ first grandchild. Whenever Ava’s birthday arrives, it is a day of happiness and love, two-fold; one, because she is becoming more loving, beautiful, and exceptional with each passing year, and two, because my father has been blessed with another year on this earth.

Let me start at the beginning.

For me Ava and Papa’s lives will forever be intertwined for me. My brother and his wife announced the pregnancy with snow globes for each of my parents, with a small picture of Ava’s ultrasound, on a December morning in Jackson at the Cracker Barrel. In the new year, we found out that the soreness and pain my father had been feeling on and off for the past few weeks, were symptoms from his now diagnosed cancer.

Talk about facing life and death.

As the months progressed Ava grew and my father experienced numerous health setbacks and scares as the doctors tried to determine the best way to combat his internal foe. Meanwhile, marooned in New York, I felt helpless, unable to see Dad or celebrate with my brother as Ava’s birthday drew near. It was the first time my mother uttered to me, in the middle of the night, after waking from a terrible nightmare, “Lissa, we’re always where we’re supposed to be.”

In time, check ins with mom turned into “check ups” on Dad. I was afforded an amazing opportunity to flex my acting muscle at Williamstown Theatre Festival, I had my doubts about not going home for the summer, but Mom and Dad assured me, that I had to keep moving forward and if anything should happen, they’d get me home.

A few weeks passed before I got the phone call, “Hey Aunt Melissa!” from my brother. Ava was beautiful! All ten fingers and toes, and Dad was starting to receive treatment and was getting somewhat accustomed to his new circumstances.

Now I could keep going but I’ll stop here and say that just last month, my dad got to spend time with Ava and his two grandsons in Jackson.Β Look what God can do!

Birthdays are always amazing days filled with reflection, gratitude and joy. But when I think of Ava’s birthday, it’s a birthday for my dad as well. A day that symbolizes life for them both.

Ciao πŸ™‚

Tuesday Thoughts

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they move in time to the music

their bodies infused with a boundless energy

observing them, from my perch at the bar, I am envious and enamored

catching glimpses of their syncopated movements

i notice the soft touches, a shimmer of joy in the eyes, and the brief inhalation of shampoo and cologne.

watching them, i come to know them

the tender moments spent in bed,

the passion that could erupt in an argument over whose turn it was to take out the trash,

grocery shopping trips, holidays, inside jokes, and vacations.

her head falls back as the drummer hits the snare again and again

the song’s climax sounds near

yet as he draws her close to him, ready to find an ending

the keyboardist picks up the melody and they continue…

Pulling Triple Duty (Wordy Wednesday)

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BREATHE…

i know that yesterday i conveyed that my life is moving at a crazy clip, and i thought today i would break it down a bit for you for this Wordy Wednesday. being able to say at the top of 2015, i am effectively wearing about four hats at a time, is a pretty awesome accomplishment. not only am i approaching my acting career with renewed vigor and focus, but i’m back in the teaching seat with my students over at Stella Adler and will soon set foot back on Riker’s Island. working with the Rising Circle Theater Collective now, i am exposing myself to the ins-and-outs of the not-for-profit theatre world, (grant writing, social media push, building community) and lest we forget, my day job is leering its head as well. talk about a whole bunch of responsibility! i am just chomping at the bit to give my all, placing my hands in the fire as it were, and marching forward with gusto and joie de vivre.

it’s so great to stretch every muscle that makes me a unique individual. calling upon my love of culture, of diversity, Shakespeare, the written word, the power of theatre, and the vitality of life and the human experience has already begun to shape 2015 into something truly spectacular, and the month isn’t even over yet. what whirlwind! so much in store, tons of which i don’t even know exist yet.

Ciao πŸ™‚